Is it just me, or has quiet, peaceful and constant time alone actually done the opposite of what I thought it would? When quarantine just began back in March I was upset, but trying to see it as a time when I could find more peace than I usually do in my normal, everyday life. In my head it was a math equation : Being Alone + Lots of Free Time = Peace. I quickly realized life is sadly not as simple or logical as an algebra problem. 

Why was I feeling anxious? Why was I getting easily irritated? Why couldn’t I just take the time to meditate, pray, keep my room clean, spend time with God? My excuse had always previously been, “I WOULD do that buuuut, I NEVER have the time”. I realized my problem was, I was leaving God out of the equation. I was asking myself, but I wasn’t asking him. I wasn’t turning to God to find peace, but I was looking to coloring books, online games, Netflix, the pool, dance classes and my friends. Those things are all incredible! But sometimes I find that instead of bringing me perfect peace, they bring me quite a bit of stress, and sometimes even a lack of fulfillment. 

Psalm 91 tells us: 

“Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High

    will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.”

For most of this time, I was trying to build my own shelter, depending on myself to find rest and relief. Psalm 91 reminds me that God is my shelter and my dwelling place. He provides protection and perfect peace to those who love and trust in him! The idea of “resting in the shadow of the Almighty” is so full of tranquility and knowing that I can rest in the presence of God gives me a total sense of calm. 

The end of Psalm 91 is a reminder of God’s promise to us. I read this when I start to feel anxious and it helps ease my worry. I hope it does the same for you! 

“‘Because he  loves me,’ says the Lord, ‘I will rescue him;

    I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name.

He will call on me, and I will answer him;

    I will be with him in trouble,

    I will deliver him and honor him.

With long life I will satisfy him

    and show him my salvation.’”